We lead off with the kind of report you sort of expect from kids maybe 15 or 16 years old, at which you might just cluck your tongue and perhaps smile at your own memories.
But when "kids" get to be 21 and 22, we really find this sort of nonsense stupid.
At 3:01 a.m. Wednesday, police arrested three young men, 18, 21 and 22 years old, and a 17-year-old boy, all from Wauwatosa, for resisting arrest after a caller reported that they had opened a fire hydrant at Maple Terrace and North 72nd Street and then run off toward Hart Park.
A officer answering the call pulled into the Hart Park parking lot and spotted the four emerging from the woods along the Menomonee River. He distinctly heard one of them say, “I hope they have flood insurance.”
When they saw the squad car, they turned and ran back across the Oak Leaf Trail bridge. The four scattered, but all were rounded up at locations ranging from the , 1155 Honey Creek Parkway, all the way to , 7677 W. State St. in the Village.
None gave any clear explanation for why they opened the hydrant in the first place, and each said in so many words that it was his natural instinct to run from the police.
Each received a $303 fine, which we can hope grows them up a little quicker.
In other recent incidents:
At 12:55 a.m., the manager of Walter’s on North, 6930 W. North Ave., flagged down a Wauwatosa police patrol officer to say that he had just seen a subject pulling on the door handles of cars in the tavern’s rear parking lot. He said he then saw the suspect walk around the building to , 6902 W. North, and heard the sound of a car door closing. The manager followed and said that when the suspect saw him, he ran. The manager gave chase but lost sight of the suspect in the yards between North 71st and 72nd streets. He described the suspect as a younger white male, 5-feet 9-inches to 5-feet 10-inches tall, wearing a dark T-shirt and dark shorts.
At 3:47 p.m., police were called to the store at 6950 W. State St. on a report of a retail theft of just over $150 worth of groceries. Employees saw a man ring up the items at a self-checkout counter and then swipe a card and quickly leave with the bagged goods. But the card, which proved to have been a food stamp card, was declined and no transaction was completed. The thief, described as a white male, 30 to 35 years old, 6-feet 1-inch tall, 180 to 200 pounds, with brown hair, wearing a red T-shirt, gray sweatpants and a baseball cap, left in a red Ford pickup truck pulling a black trailer.
A resident of the 6500 block of Powell Place reported that between 12:30 and 2:30 p.m. someone stole a box of medical catheters off her front step, which she had placed there for pickup by FedEx.
A resident of the 6400 block of Upper Parkway North reported that overnight someone had dumped out the contents of her yard waste container – a metal garbage can – and then stolen it.
At 3:30 p.m., a Shorewood man reported that he had left $500 cash in an envelope on a table at the , 2350 N. Mayfair Rd., and that after having lunch with his father, they had forgotten the money. When they returned 10 minutes later, it was gone. There are no suspects.
A resident of the 7200 block of West Lloyd Street reported that between 6 and 9:50 p.m. someone had vandalized 14 arborvitae shrubs in his yard by shearing off multiple branches. It was the second such incident he has suffered, as his hedge had been attacked on July 22 as well.
At 8:45 p.m., a 40-year-old Milwaukee woman was arrested for theft after she tried to leave , 6700 W. State St., without paying for three bottles of vodka. A records check showed she had an outstanding Glendale warrant for retail theft and a criminal record of 22 arrests.
At 8:26 p.m., a 17-year-old Milwaukee girl was arrested for theft after she was caught leaving with $117 worth of clothing items hidden in her purse.
At 4:08 p.m., a 31-year-old Milwaukee woman was arrested for theft at Metcalfe’s Sentry after she hid two bottles of over-the-counter pain medicines in her purse and tried to leave the store without paying for them.
At 9:45 p.m., a 22-year-old Dayton, Ohio, man flagged down a Wauwatosa police officer in the parking lot of Mayfair Mall and said he had two outstanding warrants for which he wanted to give himself up. He was taken to the station where he signed two promise-to-appear bonds for disorderly conduct and underage drinking violations and was released.
At 6:32 p.m., a 30-year-old Riverdale, Ill., man was arrested for passing counterfeit bills at , 3900 N. 124th St. Police were called to the store after a clerk reported that the suspect had just bought a $500 iPad and a $60 case for it with 12 suspicious $50 bills. Officers followed the man from there to the Walmart store at 3850 N. 124th St. and then to Goodwill, 12121 W. Feerick St., where he was arrested.
At 4:18 p.m., an 18-year-old Milwaukee man was arrested for theft at the State Street Pick ‘n Save after he hid a bottle of vodka and a bottle of Rosie’s Drink Mix in a backpack and tried to leave the store without paying for them.
A 90-year-old Milwaukee woman reported that she had her pocket picked while she was in , 8616 W. North Ave. Her wallet was stolen by an unknown suspect and her credit cards were used in at least six fraudulent purchases before she could cancel them.
A resident of an apartment building in the 7400 block of West Center Street reported that overnight someone smashed two windows out of his car and stole his dashboard stereo while the car was in the building’s parking garage.
At 9:30 p.m., two 15-year-old Milwaukee girls were arrested for disorderly conduct and criminal damage to property after they got into an argument with an employee of the and one of them threw a rock through the back window of his car. The man said the girls were loitering outside the store and that he and other employees recognized them as having stolen from the store in the past. He said that when his shift ended he went to his car and asked the girls what they were doing there. They began to yell profanities at him, he said, and then one of the girls broke his window and they both ran. He chased them and cornered one in a neighbor’s yard, and the other was corralled by police.